tumble AYL jumble

For the past couple years I’ve tried to do daily devotions. I’m not sure how other people choose which passage to read, but personally…I choose randomly. Like, more often than once I would take the date (4.10.12) and would transform that into Book 4, Chp 10, Verse 12. Something like that. But if it didn’t work out I would just scramble it around to make it work somehow.

This method worked for awhile but I was never fully consistent in my reading. I think the longest I went without missing a day was one week (I’m weak…). It’s pretty hard. Honestly, some days it’s just really hard—I might be sleepy, I rather do something else, I forget. For some reason making excuses is so much easier even though it takes the same amount of energy.

Anyways, I’m a “planning” type of person; meaning I like knowing what I need to do, when I need to do it by, and how I’m going to do it. In this sense, I’m pretty OCD. If you ever see my with a little black notebook, it honestly contains my whole life. (I love scribbling my thoughts, ideas, plans, schedules etc in random notebooks I carry…I own a lot). Couple of the pages in my notebook contain pages titled “TO DO LIST WEEK ??” and I will literally list ever single thing I’m going to do for that day, in the order (sometimes listed by time) that I’m going to do it by. Usually, I’ll follow it exactly to the T. Call me crazy, but I like knowing what I’m going to do, because if I don’t have anything planned then I’ll probably just rot away wasting my time.

What does this have to do with my daily devotion?

Well, I thought that if I knew what I should read for that each day it would give me more of an incentive to read my bible EVERYDAY. That’s why I took on the 1 YEAR BIBLE CHALLENGE. RAH. Yeah, I’m attempting. I’m sure that I’ll probably miss a few days, but I’m really trying to be consistent and so far so good. But, even better I have someone to keep me accountable! heh :) @Sam Hoonie Kim.

We both started the same day April 8, 2012 (Easter Sunday!).

AFTER WE READ: write whatever speaks to you in the notebook and we’ll meet weekly and share.

IF WE MISS A DAY: whoever misses a day has to put a $1 in a jar and by the end of the year we shall see how many dollars there are. Hopefully not too many!

bible challenge moleskine! heh :)

AYLart

362days.to.go.

My Small Group is the biggest blessing I’ve ever been given!!

It has renewed my love for God and only makes me desire Him even more :)

I only met with my girls once, and even though we were freezing outside and it only lasted about 30-40 minutes…it was one of the best experiences. I’m so glad I got to meet with them before the Thanksgiving break! I was overwhelmed with love for them and I can literally count the times I’ve actually talked with them on my hand! It’s amazing the love that God can place in your heart.

I honestly didn’t expect to feel like this at all. I didn’t imagine I would be impacted so hard. I’m loving every second of it. It’s been awhile since I’ve felt so strongly for something and it’s refreshing and livening.

In the beginning, before I even received my small group I was so nervous and even second guessed myself a few times. But now, being here, right now, I wouldn’t have it any other way. I couldn’t be any happier for choosing to stick with my decision to be a leader.

I’m so thankful for my SG girls and I can’t wait for this year. I know God has big plans for us and I’m looking forward to every minute I’ll get to spend with them.

God has answered all my prayers. I’ve put my faith in Him and He never fails to shower me with His grace and love.

Prayer Request: That both my SG girls will be able to go to UR. (I know right now it’s near impossible since SD already exceeds the limit, but God works miracles and I know if it’s His will, then He’ll make a way)

Philippians 4:4-7 <3

So many of you know that we just got our SG’s yesterday and that there are less freshmen than usual (esp girls). I just wanted to share somethingg :)
I was talking with melissa today and I mentioned that we don’t have enough girls, and asked her to tell any freshmen about SG’s and see if they’re interested. She has a lab partner that’s a non-Christian but interested and with just one text the freshman replied that she was interested! :D Thank God! :)

Soo basically, bottom line is….if a non-christian is willing to put herself out there without even going to KCM once yet then I’m sure that there are a lot of other freshmen that just haven’t been reached out to! :D So if you know a freshmen that may be interested (or maybe even not, doesn’t matter)

I’m encouraging you to text them and see if they’re interested in SG. It’s not too late! :) we’ll be announcing them tomorrow :D

Stumbled by association. I shouldn’t judge, because honestly what do I know…if I judge another, it would make me a hypocrite and I should just eat my own words. Confusion. I looked upon and respected, but now I don’t know what to think at all.

We believe.

We love.

We have faith.

We are saved.

Yet do the little beliefs count as well? I believe what I believe. I can’t tell where it roots from. Do I believe it? Or does the things people say affect what what I believe? Do I actually believe what I think I believe? What do I do when it starts to affect the way I see people? Stumbled.

I should look up to you, yet I can’t help but feel unsatisfied. Bothered.

The gates have closed and the window is shut unless I can find the key.

Romans 14.

Its been awhile since I’ve posted anything. But I decided to write a little update on my life! (Academic Life that is)

I talked to a lot of people and did a lot of thinking, and realized that I really don’t have ANY idea of what I want to be—not even the slightest idea. So after a lot of staring at the walls imagining the future and talking to my parents. I have discovered the best/closest thing to a solution.

Basically, I decided to change my major. I am no longer a Literature/writing major! Now, I am a Media major and Lit/writing minor. I think it’s going to open up a lot more professions that interest me while my lit/writing minor would allow me to pursue my interests in writing. I guess it’s never too late to do what you truly love right?

I love writing. I love film production. And this way, I’ll be able to pursue both my interests in the most efficient way (hopefully). My plans, so far, are to deepen my understanding of filmmaking and editing for next year when I’m planning to apply for an internship at Walt Disney! :D And on the side, in my spare time, I’ll continue writing my book (if I don’t reach my goal of finishing it by the end of this year).

All this thinking led to a self-realization. I’m the type of person who has a lot of interests and is very easily distracted. I have a lot of talents but not ONE talent that I’m truly good at. I guess having many different talents may be preferable but sometimes I wish I was just really, really good at one thing. It could have allowed me to easily identify with my dream profession. Instead of going this roundabout way :P

Technically, I don’t really have a dream profession. Honestly, I’m kind of jealous of those people who know exactly what they want to be because they love it so much. I wish there was something that I was so passionate about that there would be no question of what my future was going to entail. There are professions I prefer over others, but one does not supersede the others. As of now, I’m thinking of going into something related to animation. We’ll see where this takes me. Hopefully I don’t end up changing my major last minute —;

My advice to you is to follow what you truly love to do, not what you think is best. No matter how unstable your dream job is, if you wholeheartedly pursue it in every possible way, you’ll achieve it in the end. If not….well then, God has a better plan for you, you just don’t know it yet! :D

NUMBER 11: Get an internship at Walt Disney

this is in no particular order hehe

1. atleast 4gb RAM for my laptop — it’s starting to lag while i edit videosss :((

2. rainboots in time for april showers?! :D

3. Canon Rebel T2i: i want to be able to film videos with a camera~ plus i want to take it to koreaa over the summerr

4. cupcake holder for 24 — preferably before april birthdays! asldkjfsak

5. external hard drive, i have too many videos i’ve edited on my computerr

i need a jobbbb :(

writing is the solace to my heart.

Upon entering college, questions like, “What do I want to be? What do I want to major in? What profession can I reap the most benefits and will not have to hate going to?” continually flood your mind. Well, at least for me it does.

The number one small talk conversation I have with people at least once is:

Person: So, what’s your major?

Me: Literature/Writing

Person: O.O OH. What do you plan to do with that?

Me: … … I have no idea … …

I really don’t have a steady profession planned that’s related to my major. I just know that I enjoy writing more than math, science, history, etc. If I’m lucky, my book will make it big and I won’t have to get a full time job.

Like everyone, I have an ideal future.

Socially, I want to be settled and married with 3 kids. I want to live a comfortable life in a nice house with a siberian husky too! The American Dream-type thing. haha

Occupationally, I want to finish my book series and get it published. Hopefully, it’ll be some what popular and I’ll earn some money from it. Which will allow me to open up a bakery! Yes. I do want to open a bakery :) So, all this monthly birthday cupcake baking is really just practice for the future. My sister and I decided a while back that we would open a cupcake store called **** **. (I won’t disclose the name of the store because it might ruin the innovative idea that we had planned.)

It’s going to be scrumdiliumcious :9 So when I do open it, make sure you come and buy some! hehe

After joining inreach and volunteering to bake cupcakes every month for birthdays, I discovered that I actually really enjoy it. It may be time consuming and tiring, but I find it somewhat relaxing and fun.

I’ve also been slowly buying some cupcake decorating supplies. But there are so many things I still want to invest in.

1. I want to buy a cupcake holder too…so I don’t drop any anymore. —;

2. A cute apron because by the time I’m completely done it’s like I’ve iced myself with frosting. 

3. A kitchenaid! It would be so much faster having this little machine mixing the batter while I decorate or something.

Before college I never baked anything from scratch, and it’s honestly my first time actually legitimately baking. I really hope I have a job that allows me enough leverage to open my own business. Maybe, one day my sister and I will enter Cupcake Wars (on foodnetwork).

I’m going to open the next Sprinkles/Crumbs.

Anyways…hopefully everyone is doing well on their finals!! :)) gooodluckk and study harddd

NUMBER 10: Open my own business.

I never really understood how blessed I truly was. I realized I’ve been selfish and greedy. I wanted more even though I already had enough. I have more than I deserve and I find myself complaining about what I don’t have instead of being thankful for what I do have. There are so many people who would give anything for the life I have and I take it for granted and just want more.

I want more, more, more. But all this time, I’ve been wanting all the wrong things. My eyes were out of focus. I wasn’t looking at what I should have.

I want to be thankful for everything that God has given me.

I want to truly understand the blessings that God has shone upon me.

I want to be able to bless whoever I can.

I want to want the things that truly matter in life.

Thank you for the life you have given me.

Thank you for my family.

Thank you for my friends.

Thank you for the windows of opportunities that you opened for me.

Thank you for the love you have surrounded me with.

Thank you for watching over me in my times of need.

Thank you for guiding me in the direction I should be going.

Thank you for staying by my side.

Thank you for the little things that I overlook.

Thank you for everything.

진<3

Do you ever just sit and do nothing?

I don’t understand it myself, but for some reason I’m feeling really out of it. I literally want to just sit down, stare at nothing, and just think about anything. Mostly just one thing. But I’m not sure why. It’s confusing.

I’m really all over the place with this post, but I just wanted an outlet—writing is the best reliever for me personally. My fingers are just typing away the first things that come into my head. I don’t have an outline…I’m just going with the flow.

It only really started today, this feeling. I’m not sure what it is—if it’s good or if it’s bad. I guess I have an idea, but then again I hope I’m not right. I’ve been trying to empty my mind of it and just let it go, but it keeps on bubbling up inside of me. I’m really just trying to wait it out until I figure out what this is for sure. GAHH…it’s annoying though. sighhh.

I just needed to vent/release my frustrations….

randomm facts

1. i’ve only started to bake from scratch since i entered college—sooo all them cupcakes/cakes you people have been eating, secretly i have been you using you guys as my test subjects! :D heh

2. i love firsts—i like new things

3. you’d think vanilla extract would taste good..WRONG…it taste nastayyy—word of advice: if you get some on your finger while cooking don’t lick it, wash it off

4. i have random moments where i’ll act kind of crrazy in a good way…you know if you’ve been with me when the transformation happens ;) there are only a select few

5. i don’t like scary movies, but i’m cursed with curiosity so it’ll always get the better of me and if i start watching i can’t help but want to know how it’ll end

6. my aunt is studying to be a director and she wants me to be her editor loll

7. i like to drive with my windows down, music pumping, hair flying :)

8. i used to think i was stubborn, but now i think i compromise fairly well

9. yes. i secretly want to jump on the bandwagon and buy a bike…loll

10. matching pairs

PS. 11. God answered one of my New Years’ Day prayer requests recently hahahah amazing really!

Ok after writing this…I honestly feel a lot better.